Relationships: What Is Our Most Important Relationship?

November 3, 2022

During our lives we can have many relationships and some of these relationships can last for what feels like moments and others can seem to last a lifetime. It could be greeting someone we might never see again or embracing someone we will see many times.

These relationships can range from a childhood friends, colleagues, family members or a partner for instance. And no matter how old or young we are; proven spells that work what is clear is that we have all had relationships that have started and relationships that have come to an end. For these beginnings and endings are part of life.

Now, some of these may be relationships that we wish had never been started and relationships that we wish had never come to an end. But what life shows us is that we never know how long a relationship will last.

The Relationship That Lasts

However, there is one relationship that for as long as we live can never come to an end. We might wish it would end at times and deny this relationship at other times, but it still exists. And this relationship – is the one we have with ourselves.

And although our external circumstances can change and our external relationships can end; this is a relationship that is always ever present and in motion.

A Metaphor

What I thought was a great metaphors for explaining this dynamic was a conversation that I had many years ago with my late father. I used to go to a martial arts club that was a short drive away from where I lived and this first began when I was at school and ended in my college years.

And to paraphrase what was said in this conversation: I said something along the lines of; it is was interesting how although I had left school and other experiences had come and gone in my life, what remains is me going to this martial arts club.

I recently thought about how this mirrors the relationship that we have with ourselves.

The Greatest Rejection

Even though it is possible for another human being to neglect, reject, betray, criticise and abandon us; it is also possible that we are doing these very things to ourselves internally.

We can feel overwhelmed and frustrated with these external relationships and then, follow that up with the abuse and neglect of ourselves. And one thing that is certain about life is that not everyone will accept us or respond in a way that validates us.

This is what makes it so important that we don’t close the door on the relationship that has the potential to bring the greatest joy and fulfilment.

Relationship with Ourselves

The relationships that we have with others will only ever be as good as the relationship we have with ourselves. It is highly unlikely that our external relationships will ever surpass our inner relationship.

Whether our life will rise or fall will depend on the quality of our relationship with ourself and as an extension of that – our relationships with others.

And one of the reasons why external rejection, abandonment and neglect for example are so painful is because these feelings often exist within. They are perspectives and outlooks that one can come to identify with. This is because during our childhood year’s one is often rejected and abandoned and unless these experiences have been processed, they will lay dormant and have the potential to be triggered at any moment by the relationships that one has with others.

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